Wednesday 15 October 2014
Biography_DRT_1
This is a short biography of Irienne Margaretha Loho, a tough woman I have ever met in this world. She was born on september, 26 1972 in jember. She is the first daughter of Alfred Max Loho and Irmawati Sianne Tjandra. She has two young sisters.
When she was teen, her mother sold a traditional snack and she always helped her mother to deliver the order to her customers. She always woke up earlier in the morning before she went to school. Everyday in her life, she was always independent and never complaint about anything. Her father said "You're my beloved daughter, i love you". It reminded her that she must make her life important.
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Nonik ada yang miss vocab nya " erlier " ..
ReplyDeleteHehehe :D
Tetep semangat ya kerja tugas2nya, AYAS !! :D
I do agree with Hisasi (thanks for the constructive feedback).
ReplyDeleteFurther,
please check again these sentences:
* When she was teen, her mother sold a traditional snack. and she always helped her mother to deliver the order to their customers. (check the punctuation)
*She always woke up erlier in the morning before she goes to school. (check the tense)
*Everyday in her life, she always independent and never complain about anything. (this sentence needs a "to-be")
*It's remind her that she must make her life important. (check whether it needs a "to-be".
Okay sir, thanks advance
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